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Lemonsky last won the day on April 9

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  1. It's actually kind of a positive thing (I hope this doesn't come off as rude) since if you pay attention to the negative feelings, you'll probably be able to look for the reason behind the negativity and eventually work it out. To me it's just that I drown my worries in either studying or the internet and I'll very likely end up forgetting about feelings for a while - which doesn't actually remove the problem but kind of just 'postpones' it. It's good to hear that you see those changes though, that's great progress!
  2. I have nothing diagnosed but man, do I find it hard to love myself. Seeing a psychologist helps on many levels but I don't know what to think about hearing that my reality is skewed as I see myself as so much worse than the others. She might be right about how I see myself but there's really nothing skewed about it. Sometimes it's a bit difficult to tell which feelings are real and which aren't, so my way of trying to feel better is to just ignore the negative feeling until I can't notice it anymore. Maybe not the best way to solve problems but at least the negative things won't hurt me while I don't remember they exist. Feel free to ignore my rambles, I don't know what I'm doing.
  3. The feeling of not having to set an alarm for the next morning, which means having extra hours to sleep is always something relaxing. I also really like to watch movies or listen to music in a comfortable position.
  4. I'll be forever thankful for my best friend for introducing Susumu Hirasawa's music to me.
  5. Me neither really. My nonexistent gaydar is probably also more likely just "what ifs" instead of actually sensing someone's sexual orientation.
  6. Cats! They're quiet and independent, but can still keep you company. I love it when they purr and hang around to receive petting, it must be the cutest thing. Our cats, Tiuku and Alma, are my favorite cats. This emoticon looks oddly like Alma. As I've mentioned in my introductory post too, I also like sharks. They're beautiful and intimidating.
  7. That has kind of happened to me already - one of my friends just told that I 'have a girlfriend in another country' in front of my other friend and a classmate (I'm using the word classmate since she doesn't want anything to do with us anymore), even though it wasn't anything else but a simple crush. They obviously ended up asking if I'm not actually straight and I couldn't lie - although I was embarrassed because it had happened so quickly like that. And now that the classmate has disappeared and has stopped responding to any of us completely, I have my own suspicions - who knows what she'll do. I'm always feeling on edge when personal information is revealed. So yes, I'm nervous that the information will somehow find its way to someone I don't want to come out to, via a former friend or someone else.
  8. Razors leave behind itchy spots and bleeding so I don't exactly enjoy shaving. There has been at least one occasion when I accidentally shaved off a patch of skin on my leg and wow, was the shower floor bloody. I let my arm hair be since I've never felt the need to shave it off. I still try my best to shave my legs and underarms when necessary though because someone could get frightened if I didn't. Summer is the time for shaving in my case since I tend to wear shorts a lot. I don't shave during winter (if there aren't any gym classes in the swimming bath) - why bother when no one's going to see the effort anyways!
  9. Single and (I accidentally typed single ant at first but I think that would describe me just as well) not any sure what to do about it. I know I've replied to this thread already with the same stuff - things are still weird but right now I'm also partly wondering about what it would be like to be in a relationship. But still partly feeling bad that I'm so me. I have a very weird need to ramble today.
  10. Someone taking my phone is instantly suspicious but not because I'd have something crucial to hide - it's more just that that I don't trust easily so it instantly feels like that person wants to change all my passwords and lock me out of my own phone. Since I'm also embarrassed of my way of texting or pretty much everything, I wouldn't want anyone to find out how many times I've accidentally forgotten the appointments with my psychologist for example. People often tell me that I think too much but as much as I hate it when they say that, they're right. I think too much even when the situation is as mundane as someone looking at my phone.
  11. Badminton is such a fun sport! It's the one I actually enjoy playing which is why I do it a lot during summer. We usually go and see relatives on our summer cottage in summer and just spend time together, and badminton is the perfect sport to play in the sun and then go for a swim in the lake if it gets too warm.
  12. This is just my opinion but I've found spray better myself. I've noticed that roll-on deos give me a bit of a slimy sensation whereas spray ones don't. I haven't noticed any darkening of the skin though, no matter which ones I use.
  13. A soundtrack from the movie Arrival. It was such a great movie that I'm definitely going to cry over it for a long time.
  14. My best friend linked me a bunch of songs from Hirasawa Susumu and one certain piece called Run has become one of my favorite songs to listen to. Many other pieces by the same artist are really good too! I'm so glad the friend provided me such great content.
  15. There are people out there that ask something like "Why do you hate men?" just the moment a woman mentions they're into other women. Gladly I haven't personally met any yet, but sometimes I come across comments like that on the internet. I just find it super weird that someone can take the sexuality of a lesbian as a personal attack. This isn't a question but just as frustrating to hear from anybody; all kinds of comments relating to 'being able to change one's sexuality'.